Riceys Mission blog: I got the opposite of what I expected

As I said in my last email, I made a goal to "walk with Christ" this week. It took a lot of effort on my part, trying to do as the Savior did, be more like Him. It seemed that this week, my efforts were being frustrated and I faced more trials and difficulties over the other weeks that I hadn’t been trying so hard to perfectly try and do everything the Lord would do. It was confusing, heart breaking and even more difficult to feel the spirit. My personal study was ineffective, I didn’t feel like sharing my feelings, my patience was being tested and I was not myself, I felt self inadequacy, blank mind and frustration. It was a struggle for me because instead of feeling closer to Christ, I felt farther away. It brought me to my knees more in sincere and diligent prayer, it made me want to work harder, be better. I realized through this time, some of what Christ may have actually felt during His earthly ministry. I literally walked with Christ and felt the pulling effects of Satan. While Christ was serving others, blessing them, and establishing the Church, Satan was right there beside Him, frustrating all His efforts. Satan is trying to mute out any of our knowledge of Christ. He blurs our vision and Christ is out of focus. It takes work and effort to clear our vision, to see Him clearly right in front of us, but when we do, how miraculous and wonderful that experience is, to see his face right in front of us in the clearest way! Satan is trying to blur the believer’s vision. I can see how frustrated Christ must have felt. I was able to feel some of those same feelings. My walk with Christ was an unusual one, I got the opposite of what I expected, maybe something more realistic. All I know is that God knows my desires and He is providing me with opportunities for me to learn in His will. At the end of my journey, we had interviews with our mission president and I shared my experience with him and what I learned. After I had my interview with him, I didn’t feel those feelings anymore. It seems that that was my pivot point. This was a very special Christmas present to me and it was a great way to share my Christmas time with the Lord. I feel that I know Christ more personally. I know that He lives!

Sister Wright

p.s. we are now doing a Christmas party! The missionaries are in charge of a skit... so we are acting to the Michael Buble version of jingle bells with a twist. The sisters are lip syncing to the man part and the 4 elders are in a quartet acting as the girls with very girly moves ha-ha when rehearsing it, I couldn’t stop laughing! It was the greatest; we will take a video on Wednesday!

Merry Christmas!